A head cold has plagued me all weekend, but this morning I did manage to look over the last chapter I’d written, although I don’t plan on adding to The Hawk today. This last part of the story is taking its own sweet time, but I’m grateful to be writing anything these days. What I’ve come to realize about this final section is not only is it the end of the novel, but a call to remain steadfast in accepting it’s not about my efforts. Its conclusion is yet another path on my journey, and I’ll reach it in due time.
But isn’t that life in a nutshell? While getting older has curtailed some of my writing abilities, it has enhanced my perspective, not that I wish to employ age as an excuse. However I’ll be honest, I don’t write at the drop of a hat anymore. Part of that is due to mental fatigue, as well as honoring a craft that demands more skill than when I started this fiction gig. Thankfully sewing doesn’t require as much focus, so I did put my time to good use when not overly sneezy; I finished up the second set of blocks for another plus quilt, then arranged all the squares on the wall. Depending on how I’m feeling later today, I’ll start sewing them together, or there’s fabric to cut for a baby quilt, or….
Pulling out what I consider most of my fabric stash, I found I have as many planned quilt projects as I do novels, jeez Louise! But I didn’t feel overwhelmed; those prints are like drafts tucked away in my computer, waiting for the right moment. Or some of them might be passed on to others in need of a particular piece of cotton like stories just penned for the practice. I’m grateful for this peace of mind, because I wasn’t always so patient. Age has a way of making darn clear one’s priorities; I truly can only do what I can do.
This post has been rumbling through my head lately, alternately titled Different Rhythms. This past weekend a writing/(he)artist buddy inadvertently offered the actual title, closing her email with this phrase: In light of these dark times, remember that doing what you do best and sharing it with all who touch your life makes a difference. Laura Bruno Lilly’s words brought into focus how important are my talents regardless of their scope, as well as giving my best effort in the process. I can’t foresee how my work will affect the future, instead concentrating on making this day as peaceful and beautiful as I am able.
Whether I manage that with words or quilts isn’t important, only that I follow my heart. And if that heart is bogged down by sinus pressure, no worries; I’ll just watch a little more of the baseball playoffs, hehehe. My efforts might seem irrelevant, but every sentence and each quilt block are all part and parcel of a greater good. Maybe just acknowledging that grace is enough for this day.